The Company We Keep

As I've been a member of the job-changers club (not especially by choice), I have come to notice a few things. It's a well known fact that most of us who work for a living spend more time with the people we work with than our own families (if we have them) or with our outside-of-work friends. This is especially true if you log many hours at a job in the form of massive OT (been there before!). 

I am working at a place now where the woman who trained me has been working there for thirty years and will be retiring in just a few months. When asked why she has remained as long as she has, other than her immense benefit package and great financial compensation, her number one reason was that she enjoys the people. I've heard that before in many other circumstances. I've often heard the refrain "I hate the new management/direction of the company/whatever but...I love the people here so much that it would be too hard to leave!" 

I get it that in some cases, this doesn't always bear out. There are situations where your job is a means to an end and you are really only there for the financial considerations and not so much for the social aspect. Some people are steadfast in their rule that "they don't come to work to make friends." I sort of get that but unfortunately I am not wired that way. And it only gets worse if you're like me and like to become rooted somewhere because the longer I've stayed somewhere, the more entrenched I get and the closer I get to the people I'm working with. 

I have been fortunate enough to be in work situations where I was able to stay somewhere long enough to feel planted and then I bloomed. When I take a look at my social structure, it is truly amazing at the amount of contacts and good friends that I have amassed simply due to the fact that we all worked for the same company during the same time. I would also go out on a limb to say that some of my deepest friendships are with people who were initially coworkers and over the years have evolved into friends or beyond that, into a family of choice. I don't know if this is because I'm single and don't have a steady boyfriend/husband in my life or because it's just the way I am to become so close to people at work. 

I think that most work situations, even if they are the worst job ever, are made better by having people that you can hang out with and at times commiserate with that get you. You're all 'going through this together' and sometimes it makes the tough things easier to bear, if you know that you're not alone in that experience. You tend to band together. 

And then there is the experience that I'm in the midst of now where a lot of my coworkers from my last company have been scattered to the four winds when the company ceased to exist. Some of us are working, some of us are unemployed, others are retired. Thankfully due to social media such as Facebook, we are all just a tap away from each other. Facebook is a great way for all of us to stay on top of what is going on in each other's lives and even to set up times to get together. 

Having been in situations where people have been let go around the same times I was, there is also the phenomena known as the "Former Coworkers of XX Company Picnic/Happy Hour/Get Together." This is alive and well from what I've seen and experienced. I think also that it is a sign of the times where so many people have been blown out of good jobs due to layoffs, company shutdowns or casualties of the economy. I seem to see a lot more people who no longer work for XX company than present workers, sad but true. 

When I look at my Facebook feed, other than special interest groups that I subscribe to or know people from, most of my feed belongs to former coworkers, who even though we no longer work together, I still care very much what happens to all of these people. 

Beyond the friendship aspect, I've noticed that some of these relationships have entered closer, deeper bonds than I ever could have hoped for. The important people in my life are a good mix of folks I've encountered on my life's journey (due to membership in various groups) as well as a good smattering of former coworkers. Some of these fine folks have helped me tremendously in my personal life and continue to do so on a daily basis. I am truly blessed to know the people I do and proud to have such long-standing relationships with them.